Flatlander Wankers,

If you weren't there Friday night, you should have been.  Here's a
recap, though you don't deserve it.

The hares arrived at the start perfectly on time, which is to say, early
by hash time, so they shared a silver bullet with Cum Titty and Split
Enz, the two suckers who didn't know any better.  The rest of the pack
wandered in over the next 20 minutes, at which point the hares took off
in a cloud of powder.  Though the warmth of day had been driven off by a
cold and blustery wind, the hares were undaunted, and explored the
shiggy and creek fords down the hill to the north from the start.  The
trail snaked through an apartment complex, then through a classical
Greek neighborhood, before pausing briefly at a map in a tube slide,
which evidently noone found.  What sure must have been a fine piece of
shortcutting brought the pack to the back side of Centaurus High School,
whose grounds they crossed in short order, turning then eastward along S
Boulder Rd.  The trail flirted with a number of parking lots, cul de
sacs, and culverts, after which it ducked into open space on the
strength of a CB.  Another passthrough into neighborhood was followed by
another, longer, CB, and then the real shiggy began.  Some hounds, by
the looks of it, kept their precious feet dry, while others wallowed in
muddy water up to their tits.  One of the hares decided to go full monty
- picture a milk jug floating precariously on the surface of a deep
pool, held aloft by one slimy hand while the rest of a body is submerged
in its entirety underneath.  Ah, Cum Silent, you crazy feck.  Though the
hares did their best to keep the trail in the deep shiggy, the pack
rejected countless partially-concealed loops of barbed wire in favor of
an easy shortcut along a field edge, and jumped the hares as they were
emerging for the final dash across the field and up the hill to the
finish.  Deep managed to dupe hapless Chacockqua with the old "I'm soooo
sloooow, follow me, DUMP!" trick, but he and Hood managed to pressure
Cum Silent into an early dump and TT arrow back to the start
nevertheless.  A short amble brought the pack back to the glorious A-A
finish, where they embibed and sang of venereal diseases, sex, and
camels.

Down-downs ensued, as alluded to in the last sentence.  The 16 or so
Flatlanders raised a ruckus as they punished long time absentees Hood,
the JZA and, to a lesser extent, Shit Box Hero (Router).  There were no
namings to note.

On-afters continued at Bart's, our new hasher bar in Louisville (new to
them, anyway), where we drank cheap Michelob and sample a wide selection
of Ranch and Bleu Cheese dressings, all likely from the same vat.

Next hash is to be hared by Double D and Pukie in Golden.  I know you're
thinking, "Feckin' Golden.  Feckin' Double D.  Never again."  How many
times have we been burned by these Golden hashes?  Still, as they say,
"Half-minds were never thinkers", so keep that in your half-mind when
you jump in the car and drive down a week from Friday for more abuse. 
Our Summer schedule is in full swing, and we've had some awesome trails
so far.  Lots of old faces have been showing up as well, which pleases
me to no end.

On-on,
Deep